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SATAN DRIVES TO WORK

 
  The Title of This Entry is Too Self-Referential

19 December 2001


8:08 PM: I am playing the CD of the band that sold me the T-shirt that I am wearing. I am so meta.

(It's White Stripes, for the record. So to speak.) (Sorry, showing my age again.)

Anyway. No news. Is it raining or are they vacuuming somewhere? Or both, or neither. See, that's the problem. Always too many alternatives. Except when there aren't, where there's only one choice, and it sucks like a lamprey, but too bad because there it is and what are you gonna do about it, huh punk? I didn't think so.

I guess it's Christmas next week, huh? Fornicate a waterfowl. That snuck up on me. I should probably put all those Christmas type things into the mail soon. Tomorrow.

Oh! Outrage! Wells Fargo is Toilet! I tried to get some cash out of one of their gosh-darned ATMs. Punched all the buttons, it spits the card out, the cash door opens, whirr whirr go the rollers... Nada. No money. No receipt. Hmm. Then, OK, this was dumb I admit - I tried it again. Just to be sure. That didn't work either. I call Customer "Service" (ha). "Yes sir, I see the charges as pending on your account. Can you give me the ATM number off the receipt?" "I didn't GET A RECEIPT! I told you this twice!" "Oh yes, sir, I see that. Well, I'm sure the charges will probably just drop off the account." "What if they don't?" "Then you can file a claim to have them reversed, after they've been posted." "So first I have to wait for the money to disappear? And then I can ask you to please give it back to me? And maybe you will and maybe you won't? And in the meantime I'm just screwed? So what exactly is it that you can do now to help me?" "I'll go ahead and make a note that you intend to file a claim against these charges, sir." "Whatever..."

Day Two. Of course, the charges go through. $500 go poof. This is not a trivial amount of money in these lean Republican times. I call again the laughably-named department. I file the claim. Two business days, so maybe by Friday. But if not, oh looky there, a weekend, and then hey whoopsy, it's Christmas! So sorry. "So, isn't there some kind of record or note of my previous call about this on my file or whatever?" "No, sir, there's no record of any recent communication with Customer Service." "So will there be a record of this conversation?" "I'll go ahead and make a note on the record, sir..." Gaaaaaaaah.

The Moral is, Ha Ha Ha I'm Changing Banks Anyway. So ppppppppptttttt to them.


8:25 PM: Oh! Oh! Call and Response are playing Saturday! 20 Minute Loop are playing tomorrow! #1!





Willfully blind self-indulgent nebbish or amusingly quirky old coot? And how bout that local sports team? Discuss among yourselves.

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