28 January 1999
5:34 PM: In case you still had doubts about the alien invasion:Senate Refuses to Dismiss Case and Agrees to Call Lewinsky, Daschle Sees Clinton SurvivalJust like bacteria exchanging plasmids. That's why it's so hard to stamp them out - everytime you come up with an effective antilegislatorial agent, all you do is weed the weak ones out of the population. Then the successful mutants go and pass on their resistance to all their friends.
[...] As the Senate recessed until Thursday afternoon, senators broke up into clumps and knots on the floor to exchange ideas.
What I Learned At Sparkys Dept.: I never realized that the word "sausage" was pronounced 'bA-k&n.
Tonight! New Legend of Shaolin! Yeehah! I was actually thinking of skipping this Thursday at the UC again, in usual stolid lumplike fashion, until I saw that this was on. Jet Li and Tze Miu are so great in this movie.
The TV was on this morning while I was trying to get the timer to work. I had no idea what it was, particularly. I look up and see some scene with this girl in an extremely tight spandex-type top, facing away from the camera, who didn't seem to be doing much of anything but contriving to bounce up and down as much as possible. Hard to believe, huh? So I notice this, and I'm thinking to myself, "Geez, little obvious, eh? Still, pretty nice... AAAAH!" Suddenly I'm facing Tori Spelling! Yaiee! That head! That mascara! I think there should be some kind of OSHA rule that prohibits jump cuts to Tori.
Speaking of hideous mutants, another patented Sky-Appears-Blue bulletin from our friends at the NY Times:Genetic Mutations Accumulating Rapidly, Scientists SayCan I see a show of hands for "dumb luck"? I thought so.
[...] Harmful mutations have accumulated so fast in the human genome that the immediate question is why the human species has not become extinct.
Willfully blind self-indulgent nebbish or amusingly quirky old coot? And how bout that local sports team? Discuss among yourselves.
All names are fake, most places are real, the author is definitely unreliable but it's all in good fun. Yep.
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